People tend to experience this when they see an ex-partner involved with someone else. Many people share their feelings; my ex is dating someone else already, and it hurts. Despite thinking my ex has vanished from my mind, I feel devastated when I see them with someone else.
Getting out of a relationship isn’t easy; that’s an understatement. Severing ties with your partner is itself very upsetting. Above all, when you discover that your ex already has someone else lined up makes it even worse.
So, if you feel the same, here is what you need. This article is surely going to help you a lot. As always, we have gathered all the information you may require to understand the situation entirely.
Summary
- People often experience pain and devastation when they see their ex-partner with someone else.
- It can hurt even if you’ve moved on, as it may indicate that you haven’t fully healed.
- Seeing your ex with someone new can make you question their feelings for you and feel like you’re being replaced.
- Factors such as being in a rebound relationship or still having strong feelings for your first love can intensify the pain.
- Feeling hurt may also stem from ego, comparing yourself to the new partner, and feeling like a failure.
Table of Contents
My Ex is Dating Someone New – Why It Hurts?
When you’ve moved on, the idea of getting back together with your ex probably won’t pop into your head too frequently. There’s the possibility of you falling for anyone else who makes you feel special and loves you a lot.
You may still feel hurt even after moving on when you see your ex has also moved on.
Seeing your ex moved on after you’ve moved on too shouldn’t bother you a bit. You should be happy, right? However, there are times when you feel the opposite. You feel sad and upset instead of feeling happy.
Seeing your ex moved on sometimes hurts even when you don’t intend to get back together. There are some reasons behind it, and they are as follows.
1. You Haven’t Completely Moved On Yet
It might take a little longer to heal fully, even if you’re currently in a relationship. When a person moves on, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they forget about their past. The past doesn’t mean anything to them. Instead, they accept reality.
Even after a breakup, it is normal to feel attached to the person you shared beautiful moments with. You may still feel sad or miss your ex sometimes.
2. It Seems Your Ex Doesn’t Care About the Past
No matter how happy you are in your life, you feel sad when you see your ex happy. The fact that your ex never looked as pleased with you as they seem with their new partner hurts you the most.
It seems your ex doesn’t care about you and the past anymore. You may question whether they were genuinely interested in you do not. In such situations, seeing your ex dating happily hurts you the most.
3. You Are in A Rebound Relationship
Relationships that take place right after a breakup are known as rebound relationships. To move on as quickly as possible, many people use rebounds as a distraction from pain.
April Davis, founder of LUMA and professional matchmaker, however, claims that After getting out of a relationship, getting into a new one immediately means that you haven’t completely recovered yet.
Source: Bustle
You may be in a rebound, but your ex may not be; your ex may have a serious relationship, which hurts you. The pain you feel seeing your ex moving on shows you haven’t completely gotten over them.
4. Your Ex Was Your First Love and So Was You
No matter how insignificant it may seem, your first love remains unforgettable. Even after a breakup, some people still feel protective of their ex. When they see their ex dating someone else, it hurts them.
You may have a feeling of possessiveness since you were their first love. That’s why when you see your ex with someone else, you get upset. You feel that the new person your ex is currently dating doesn’t deserve your ex’s love.
5. You Blame Yourself for Everything
Relationships usually require both partners to invest a great deal of time and effort. Having everything fall apart quickly and having your ex move on so easily can make you feel like a total failure.
You’re reminded of what could have been, but eventually wasn’t, whenever you see your ex with their new partner. Whenever you see your ex happy with their new partner, you feel like your heart is pinched with thousands of needles.
The pain is also further compounded by thinking: “My ex-partner is dating someone else already, and I cannot bear that, it hurts” You start to blame yourself for every bad thing which you both went through.
Whenever you are occupied with such vicious thoughts, remember that your ex will eventually reveal the actual colors.
Their new partner will soon experience the same thing you are experiencing right now. Your ex will eventually leave this new person and start their hunt for new prey (new partner).
Despite their apparent happiness, do not ignore their shortcomings. Recall their emotional inaccessibility. By recalling their weaknesses, you will feel a bit relaxed. It will help you calm down.
You might recall everything they did to make you feel unloved and unimportant. On the surface, everyone seems happy, but no one knows what goes on behind closed doors except the person himself.
6. Your Ego Is Hurting
In some instances, the “pain” you experience may not be related to the fact that you still feel affection towards your ex. There is a chance that it is just your ego being hurt. You might feel hurt due to your ego. A sense of being wanted or loved is so comforting and addictive.
Many people love that someone out there is still holding out hope for them even if they don’t reciprocate. It can be painful to see your ex with someone else after building up an illusion in your mind.
Comparing yourself to your ex’s new partner is a natural human tendency, and it can make you doubt yourself.
7. You Feel Bad As Your Ex Re-Creates Memories You Guys Shared, With Someone New
It is for this reason that special moments are regarded as sacred. Memories, places, and words you hear from your partner should feel as if they were meant for you alone. There’s nothing worse than feeling like every other ex out there.
While dating, everyone creates memories and enjoys to their fullest. However, these pleasant memories start to haunt after a breakup. It becomes unbearable to witness anyone else wanting the same kind of times you did with your ex.
8. It Feels Like You Are a Failure
You might feel like an absolute failure when a relationship doesn’t work out after you devote long hours to it. After putting in so much effort, you still feel worthless because things didn’t turn out the way you expected.
When you don’t realize why you broke up, you end up blaming yourself for the breakup. You can also feel lost after a breakup, in addition to feeling like a failure.
In her professional opinion, Heidi Krantz, a relationship and dating coach, explains it very well. She says that a breakup makes you feel a loser, but you feel you’ve lost something.
During the initial stages of a relationship, everyone seems happy. Real challenges start after the honeymoon phase.
Why Is My Ex Dating Someone?
While you’re healing and your ex has moved on, it is customary to wonder why, on earth, did this happen. You feel sad seeing your ex living their life happily without you.
There may be many questions on your mind, including why my ex seems so happy with her rebound? Why does an Ex dating someone else hurt me? Does no contact work if your ex is seeing someone else? Do exes ever come back after dating someone else?
Your doubts about your ex’s real intentions are understandable. You could be confident that your ex would be thinking the same way if the roles were reversed.
Whether you are angry or sad after a breakup is more likely to relate to the fact that your ex left you. At this point, this query is more dominant than the relationship itself.
There are a variety of feelings you feel after a breakup. Some of the most common are breakup anxiety, post-breakup trauma, feeling you’ve lost something precious, etc. Sometimes you feel nothing but frustration about getting separated from your beloved one.
Now let’s get down to business.
There is no correlation between how you were in a relationship with your ex and why he is dating someone else. This has to do instead with factors beyond your control.
Most people who start a new relationship immediately after a breakup are simply looking for gains from the new relationship. Such relationships don’t depict true love or sincerity.
After they exit a long-term relationship, people are more inclined to take the first offer on the table when someone shows interest. As soon as they find new love, they want to abandon their former partner for good.
Nowadays, couples often skip phases of courtship because of the way society is. They jump right into relationships instead of laying a tough foundation. Being in a new relationship is all about comfort and advantages, which causes destruction afterward. The building that has weak foundations is doomed to fall.
What to Do If My Ex Is Dating Someone Else and It Hurts?
Nothing is better than doing nothing when your ex begins seeing someone else immediately. In most cases, staying out of direct contact with your ex will produce the best results after a breakup.
You must take several actions if your ex starts dating someone else shortly after that:
- Avoid negative reactions
- If you’re stalking your ex and their new partner, stop right away
- Asking mutual friends about your ex is not a good idea
- Don’t talk about and to your ex
- Don’t get in touch with your ex’s new lover
- Be careful when you bump into your ex
- Become indifferent to feelings of hurt or concern
Your ex will only gravitate toward their new partner if you try to win them with inappropriate words or insecure actions. Because of that, you shouldn’t take any action rashly since it could ruin your long-term prospects.
When you appear insecure and needy, your ex may:
- Make fun of you
- Circulate your chats with your mutual friends
- Degrade or Vitiate you
- Enjoy an enormous boost in their ego
How to Cope with Your Ex Dating Someone New?
You must be searching for how to cope with your ex dating someone new; that’s why you ended up here. Firstly, we are very sorry for your loss; you know you didn’t lose anything if you see the situation appropriately. It is your ex who has lost a gem (YOU), and this reality will hit them soon enough.
However, before this reality hits your ex, you should stay strong and never allow yourself to lose yourself. First, the ex who didn’t even care about you even while dating you doesn’t deserve your care and love.
The person for whom you’re struggling doesn’t even want you to fight for them. That’s why we recommend you stop working for the wrong people. It is best if you don’t waste your efforts on the wrong person.
Your ex doesn’t deserve you to fight for him or her, and neither does your ex want that. It is in both your ex’s and your own best interest to let them date a new partner. Keep your distance and try not to interfere in their lives in any aspect.
As you and your ex broke up, whoever your ex dates is solely up to them. After breaking up with each other, you both are single by law. Therefore, you have no right over your ex, and neither does your ex.
You both should respect each other’s privacy and decisions now. There shouldn’t be anything that would hold any of you after a breakup. Getting sad and upset won’t bring any good to any one of you.
We are here to help you with how to act when you see your ex with someone else. There are some things you should never forget. If you continuously remind yourself of these things every time you miss your ex, you will be relaxed.
Breakup Ratio:
Only 15% of couples manage to overcome every obstacle. Research has shown every 7 out of 10 couples end up breaking up with each other.
Imperfections:
The person your ex is currently dating is also a human, not an angel. Humans are imperfect, so is your ex’s new partner. Soon these imperfections will stand in between them.
Filling the Void:
Most people start dating someone new to feel less lonely. Loneliness can kill a person from the inside. No matter how happy a person seems outside, but if loneliness resides inside him, he’d be dead for sure.
Rebound Relationships:
After a break up when your ex starts dating right away, it is usually a rebound. It isn’t a proper relationship. Rebound relationships are notorious for their short-term existence. People who experience rebound relationships tend to get tired of them as fast as they get fascinated by such relations.
Do Exes Ever Come Back After Dating Someone Else?
There are many emotions associated with finding out that the person you adore has a new partner. However, what’s the most frustrating thing is; it feels like re-experiencing the breakup once again. In addition, you are filled with doubts about your chances of getting back together. You feel numb as the pain takes over your whole mind and body.
Your mindset is going to change everything when you’re trying to get your ex back. There are chances of getting back together regardless of whether your ex has moved on or has a new partner. It will only drain your energy if you focus on the wrong things.
To succeed here, you’ll need to show your happy and contented side to your ex. Groom yourself and your living style in such a manner that no one in this world could resist joining too.
The more needy or pleading you are, the further away you will be from your goal of getting back together. Your ex will start to gravitate back to you if you can inspire them and continually surprise them.
Ex partners often start a relationship right after a breakup, which is called a rebound relationship. Such relationships do not last long.
Your ex can see a whole new side of you if you want your ex to see that. You can encourage them to come to you in an inappropriate manner. It would be good if you make them realize that their happiness lies within your presence.
To make your ex realize they’d be happier with you is totally in your own hands. Whether you get success or loss is solely dependent on your willpower and abilities now.
Conclusion
My ex is dating again, and it hurts; seeing my ex with someone else kills me. I want to get back to them; suggest what I should do to make my ex mine again? We hear these sentences a lot from our audience.
After reading this article, you may have an idea why an ex dating someone else hurts. When you are not genuinely over your ex, or you guys didn’t have proper closure, you continue to miss your ex.
If you genuinely want to get over your ex and enjoy your life without worrying about your ex, you should make efforts accordingly.
