How to Deal With Brother in Law Living With You: The Definitive Guide

Having a brother-in-law move in with you can be a bit of a daunting experience. It can be hard to know how to deal with the situation, and how to make sure that everyone is happy.

Whether your brother-in-law is a freeloader or just needs a place to stay for a little while, it can be tough to know how to deal with him living with you. You don’t want to be rude, but you also don’t want him taking advantage of you.

In this blog post, we will provide you with the definitive guide on how to deal with brother in law living with you!

We will cover everything from how to set boundaries, to how to get along well together. Follow these tips and you’ll be able to create a harmonious living situation for all involved!

How To Deal With Brother-in-Law Living With You?

If you’re like most people, you probably don’t enjoy having houseguests. But if your brother-in-law is living with you, it’s a situation you may have to deal with for the foreseeable future.

How to deal with brother-in-law living with you

Here are some tips on how to make the best of it.

See Things From His Perspective

The first step to dealing with your brother-in-law living with you is to see things from his perspective.

Why did he choose to live with you? Is it because he doesn’t have any other options? Or, is it because he wants to be closer to family?

Regardless of the reason, try to see things from his point of view.

If you can understand why he decided to live with you, it will be easier to deal with the situation.

For example, if he chose to live with you because he doesn’t have any other options, you may be able to help him out by looking for other housing options.

On the other hand, if he wants to be closer to family, you may be able to help him out by spending more time with him.

How to deal with brother-in-law who lives with you

Set Ground Rules

The next step to dealing with your brother-in-law living with you is to set some ground rules. This is important because it will help establish boundaries and prevent any conflict.

For example, you may want to set a rule that he cannot enter your bedroom without permission. Or, you may want to set a rule that he must respect your privacy.

Whatever rules you decide to set, be sure to communicate them clearly to your brother-in-law. This way, there will be no confusion and he will know what is expected of him.

Be Prepared for Conflict

Even if you take all the necessary steps to prevent conflict, it’s still possible that it will happen.

This is especially true if you have a close relationship with your brother-in-law. If a conflict does occur, it’s important to handle it constructively.

For example, you may want to sit down and talk about the issue calmly. Or, you may want to write a letter expressing your thoughts and feelings.

Whatever method you choose, be sure to avoid any name-calling or personal attacks. This will only make the situation worse and could damage your relationship with your brother-in-law.

Respect Each Other Space

One of the most important things to remember when dealing with your brother-in-law living with you is to respect each other’s space.

This means giving each other time and space to do things that are important to them.

For example, if your brother-in-law wants to watch a movie by himself, don’t try to force him to watch it with you. Or, if he wants to go for a walk by himself, don’t try to follow him.

By respecting each other’s space, you can avoid any conflict and maintain a healthy relationship with your brother-in-law.

Keep Communication Open

The final step to dealing with your brother-in-law living with you is to keep communication open.

This means being honest with each other about your thoughts and feelings. It also means being willing to listen to each other’s perspectives.

If you can keep communication open, it will be easier to deal with any conflict that may arise. Additionally, it will help you maintain a close relationship with your brother-in-law.

Ways You Can Deal With In-Laws Living With You While Remaining Stress-Free

If you have in-laws living with you, it can be a challenge to remain stress-free. Here are some tips that may help:

  • Be honest about your feelings: If you’re feeling overwhelmed, stressed, or just plain unhappy, tell your spouse. It’s important to communicate openly and honestly with each other so that you can work together to find a solution.
  • Find time for yourself: Make sure to find time for yourself, even if it means getting up a little earlier or going to bed a little later. This time can be used for anything that helps you relax and de-stress, such as reading, taking a bath, or taking a walk.
  • Talk to your spouse: If you’re feeling overwhelmed by your in-laws, talk to your spouse about it. They may be able to help you set boundaries or come up with a plan to make things easier.
  • Seek support: If you’re finding it difficult to cope, don’t hesitate to seek out support from friends, family, or a professional. Sometimes it can be helpful to talk to someone who understands what you’re going through.
  • Set boundaries: It’s important to set boundaries with your in-laws, especially if they are overstepping their bounds. Let them know what you’re comfortable with and what you’re not comfortable with. This will help to avoid any conflict or tension.
  • Find common ground: If you can find some common interests or activities that you can do together, it can help to build a bond and make living together more enjoyable.
  • Be patient: Things may not always go smoothly, but try to be patient and understand that everyone is adjusting to the new situation.

Why Living With In-laws Is A Bad Idea?

Moving in with your in-laws may seem like a good idea at first. After all, it can save you money on rent and help you get to know your partner’s family better.

However, there are many downsides to living with in-laws that you should consider before making the move.

Here are some of the reasons why living with in-laws is a bad idea:

1- Your Privacy Will Be Invaded.

One of the main reasons why living with in-laws is a bad idea is because your privacy will be invaded. If you’re used to having your own space, this can be a huge adjustment.

Even if you have your room, chances are you’ll still feel like you’re being watched all the time. And forget about trying to have a romantic evening with your partner – that’s probably not going to happen!

If you’re used to living alone or even just living with roommates, you’re probably not used to having someone constantly checking in on you.

With in-laws, there’s always the risk that they’ll drop by unannounced or want to know every detail of your life. This can be extremely frustrating and make you feel like you’re not really an adult.

2- Your In-Laws May Be Difficult To Get Along With.

Even if you get along great with your partner, that doesn’t mean you’ll get along with their parents. Your in-laws may be completely different from you in terms of values and beliefs.

This can make it difficult to have a good relationship with them.

In addition, your in-laws may not be the cleanest or most organized people. If you’re used to living in a neat home, this can be a huge adjustment.

3- You May Not Be Able To Afford It.

The cost of living with in-laws can be prohibitive. If you’re already struggling to make ends meet, adding another mouth to feed (or several months, if your in-laws have a large family) can be a financial nightmare. Even if your in-laws are willing to help out with expenses, they may not be able to afford to do so. This can put a strain on your relationship and make it difficult to get by.

4- You May Feel Like A Child Again.

If you’re used to living on your own or with a spouse, living with in-laws can be a big adjustment. You may feel like you’re back in your childhood home, with someone always telling you what to do or how to do things. This can be frustrating, especially if you’re used to being independent.

5- You’ll Never Truly Feel At Home

Another downside of living with in-laws is that you’ll never truly feel at home. Even if you’re getting along well with them, it’s still their house and their rules.

You might not be able to decorate the way you want or have friends over as often as you’d like. It can be tough to feel like an adult when you’re living in someone else’s home.

Even if you get along well with your in-laws, living in their house will always make you feel like a guest. You won’t be able to fully relax, and you may even start to resent them for it.

6- It Can Be A Strained Relationship

Of course, not all in-laws are bad. But even if you have a good relationship with them, living together can be tough.

It’s natural for there to be some tension when you’re sharing a space with someone. And if things do start to go wrong, it can be even harder to deal with because you’ll see them every day.

While living with in-laws can help you bond as a couple, it can also put a lot of stress on your relationship.

If you’re constantly arguing about whose parents you’re going to spend the holidays with, or feeling like you have to check in with them before making any decisions, it’s not going to be a healthy situation.

7- It’s Just Not Worth It

Overall, living with in-laws is just not worth it. You’ll have to give up your privacy, and you’ll never truly feel at home. Even if you get along well with them, it’s still a strained relationship. It’s just not worth the hassle.

How to Set Boundaries With Your Brother-in-Law Who Is Living With You?

It’s not easy living with a brother-in-law, especially if you don’t get along. But it can be even harder when he’s your only family and you’re stuck together under one roof.

If you’re struggling to set boundaries with your brother-in-law, here are a few tips that might help:

  • Talk to your spouse about your concerns. You must be on the same page with each other when it comes to setting boundaries with your brother-in-law.
  • Make a list of things that bother you. This will help you be more specific when talking to your brother-in-law about your concerns.
  • Explain to your brother-in-law why you’re setting certain boundaries. This will help him understand your point of view and hopefully respect your decision.
  • Be firm with your brother-in-law when it comes to enforcing the boundaries. If he doesn’t listen, don’t hesitate to take action such as asking him to leave the house.
  • Be assertive and clear when you communicate with your brother-in-law. He needs to know what your expectations are and what you will not tolerate.
  • Be willing to compromise. There will be some things that you’re just not going to be able to change, so it’s important to be willing to compromise on certain issues.


The best way to deal with a brother-in-law living with you is, to be honest, and upfront with him. Set boundaries and stick to them. Be assertive and don’t take any crap from him.

Most importantly, don’t let him control the situation or take advantage of you. If you follow these tips, you should be able to deal with your brother-in-law living with you without any major problems.


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