By definition, a single mother is a woman who has children but lacks a father for those children. Single motherhood is on the rise in America as well as in the rest of the world. Despite that, the struggles for the single mothers do not seem to be ending anytime soon and that is why they seem to ask questions like how to be a successful single mother.
Single mothers face judgment from all corners, but society’s judgment is much harsher when the mothers are poor or underprivileged.
This article aims to provide insight into what being a single mother is really like, the struggles they face and how to deal with them.
Summary
- Single motherhood is increasing worldwide, and single mothers face ongoing struggles and seek advice on how to be successful.
- Common struggles include lack of financial support, social stigma, criticism, physical and emotional health challenges, and safety concerns.
- Tips for success include preparing for necessities, managing time creatively, utilizing technology, seeking support from other single parents, loving oneself, being a friend to children, asking for help, avoiding guilt trips, making time for self-care, and recognizing one’s worth as a great mom.
- Research shows that being a single parent can strengthen the bond with the child.
- It is important for society to be understanding and supportive of single mothers, as they navigate the challenges of raising children on their own.
Table of Contents
Common Struggles Single Mothers Face
As we have already stated, being a single mother poses many challenges to women who could otherwise be leading normal lives. There are several obstacles that many mothers face every day, and here are just a few of them:
1. Lack of Financial Support
Often, single mothers are not only the breadwinners for their families but also act as caregivers to their children. Many (if not most) do not see any financial support from their child’s father unless they hire lawyers and take the issue to court—which is an expensive and time-consuming process.
2. Social Stigma
Being a single mother is still an incredibly taboo topic in society, but why? We’ll tell you why: it takes effort to even begin to understand what life must be like for women who have families that others see as “broken” or incomplete.
People are less inclined to want to help or be around someone who is different from them. While I understand that it is easier said than done, being open-minded and positive towards single mothers will go a long way in helping dissolve negative social stigmas against them.
3. Criticism And Judgement
While single mothers are judged more harshly than any other women for their circumstances, they are also criticized for their parenting skills.
Single mothers receive criticism on the grounds that they allow their children to act in ways that society deems unacceptable—such as three-year-old’s wearing makeup or six-year-old having cell phones—but there is no universal scale to measure what good parenting is.
4. Physical And Emotional Health
As you can imagine, being a parent is hard work—but being a single mother forces women to deal with the emotional turmoil of knowing that they are solely responsible for their children’s emotional well-being and physical comfort.
On top of that, mothers are expected to juggle their emotional needs with the expectations of being a good parent, who puts them under extra stress. And when you’re stressed, your body’s immune system gets compromised—and since motherhood is already an emotionally stressful job, this can lead to physical issues that could have been prevented otherwise.
5. Safety
Safety is one of the biggest concerns for single mothers in the United States. Not only are they faced with threats in their communities through poverty, gangs, and violence, but they also face additional dangers when walking to and from work, picking up their children at school, etc.
Single mothers across America are afraid for themselves and their children every day just because they have no one to depend on but themselves.
10 Tips To Be A Successful Single Mother
No matter how hard being a single parent may seem, one thing is for certain: You’re not alone. More than a million American children live with a single mother who has never been married, and countless others have come from relationships that didn’t last — but did produce children.
If you’re a single mom, it is obvious why you would ask questions like how to be a good mother to my daughter or son. And, though it might sound counterintuitive, research shows that being a parent who goes it alone can actually strengthen your bond with your child.
So how do you become a successful single mother? Try these tips:
1. Prepare for All The Necessities of Life
Being a single parent is tough, even when you’ve got help (and even more so if you’re on your own), but there are some things that are just part of the job — no matter what. If you have a child, you have to buy groceries for food, clothing for them to wear and toys to play with.
If they’re older, you’ll probably need to pay for school supplies, extra-curricular activities, insurance and any kind of care your family needs.
2. Manage Your Time Creatively
When you’re a single mother, there’s no time for goofing off — not even on the weekends. Your kids need you around as much as possible, which means that it may be harder to socialize with friends or go out on dates.
On the flip side, this is your chance to focus more energy on building a strong relationship with your child(ren). You can always pack up the family and head out for some fun activities together!
3. Use Technology To Your Advantage
There are plenty of tools available today that modern parents can use to help them out. In addition to babysitting websites or apps, single moms can turn to the Internet for additional parenting tips, as well as other working mothers who have been in her shoes and been successful.
Online communities can provide a wealth of knowledge that can be invaluable when it comes to balancing life as a single mom with work and fun time.
4. Seek Out Other Single Parents
Being a single mother doesn’t mean going at this alone – there are plenty of support groups across the country filled with women (and men) who face the same challenges you do on a daily basis!
Look online or ask your pediatrician for information about how you can join one near you – these people will become not only mentors but also great friends and welcome all the help you can give them.
5. Be An Example: Love Yourself First
It sounds simple, but it’s true: You can’t love anyone else unless you love yourself first. If you don’t take time to be your own best friend, how can you expect your children to do the same?
So, make sure you’re happy with who you are before you take up this task of raising children as a single mother. One day they will appreciate all of the hard work and sacrifices that go into being their mom!
6. Be Your Children’s Best Friend
It’s important to set an example for your children by being your best self, which means that sometimes you need to put aside the fact that you’re a mom and just be their friend. Don’t let down your children and do not make them a victim of your sadness.
Not only will this give you a break from all the stress of parenting but it will also help them to feel closer to you as they grow older and seek out friends of their own.
7. Don’t Be Afraid To Ask For Help!
Being a single mother is never easy, even when it seems like everyone around you has your back (or could at least lend a hand now and again). But no matter how much support you have, there are always going to be times when things get tough – and that’s okay.
If you find yourself in a bind and need some help, never hesitate to ask: your children’s other parent (if they’re still around), family members, friends — any of these people would be honored to lend their support.
And don’t forget this new support system you’ve created through the single moms’ online communities! They will become more than just an online community; they will be like your virtual village that is always there for you whenever you need them.
And don’t forget this new support system you’ve created through the single moms’ online communities! They will become more than just an online community; they will be like your virtual village that is always there for you whenever you need them.
8. Don’t Let Your Children Be A Guilt Trip
It’s true that having kids can be very scary, especially if you’re doing this on your own. While it may seem like the best choice is to stay home with them all day so you can keep an eye on them, being a single mother should never be a guilt trip.
Sometimes the best thing for the children is to let someone else take care of them for a few hours so you can have some time away. This will give both mom and child(ren) some happiness!
9. Make Time For Yourself As Well
No matter how much love you have to give as a single mom, taking care of everyone around you 24/7 will eventually take its toll if you don’t take time to recharge your batteries now and again.
Make sure you schedule in some ‘me’ time so that everyone knows their mom will be around for a long time! Even if it’s only one night a week, taking some time away from parenting duties will help you be a better mother every day.
10. Remember: You Are A Great Mom!
Being a single mom is tough work – there’s no doubt about that – but just because you’re doing this alone doesn’t mean you’re not an amazing woman or an excellent parent. Single moms are constantly being put down by people who have never even met them, which makes it easy to have low self-esteem at times. Don’t let negative talk get the best of you because you are a great mom!
Remember: Everything you do, every sleepless night and hard decision, is worth it in the end.
Realizing this will help you become the best single mother possible so your kids can grow up happy and healthy with all of your love to keep them company.