As a mother, each and every action of yours is bound to affect your daughter and shape her in a specific way for her adulthood. This explains why most mothers seem to be worried about this bond the most and tend to ask questions like “how to be a good mother to my daughter”.
No one can learn to ace motherhood in a day. It takes years and a lot of patience to be able to deal with the tantrums and other mood swings of your daughter. There is no written rule that says you cannot ask for help or read about how to become an expert mother for your child.
To assist you, we have come up with a few tips on how to be a good mother to your daughter so as to make her grow into a responsible individual, who can reciprocate the love given by her mother.
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Tips To Be A Good Mother To Your Daughter
The pressure of being a good mom only gets intense as your daughter grows up. Here are some proven ways to be a good mother to your daughter and keep proving your value in her life:
1. Infuse All The Confidence You Can In Your Daughter
Keep telling your daughter about all the achievements and amazing qualities you see in her. This way, she will get a strong sense of self-belief that will stay with her throughout life. Don’t let her be influenced by other peer pressures.
Also, watch out for any signs of low confidence creeping in and work towards getting your daughter rid of those immediately.
2. Make Your Daughter Feel Unique
Every daughter needs to feel special. Remember the birthdays, anniversaries, and any other special occasion in her life and make her feel loved. In order to be a good mother to your daughter, you need to let her know that she is unique in every possible way.
3. Parise Your Daughter For Her Imperfections and Mistakes
Every child makes mistakes. Your daughter is going to do her share of it too. As a mother, teach your daughter to grow from her errors without feeling too much shame or guilt about the same.
In order to be a good mother to your daughter, you need to make sure that she doesn’t develop a complex for making mistakes and give up trying for fear of doing the same.
4. Infuse Good Manners In Your Daughter
Manners are an essential part of personality. Teach your daughter to behave with courteousness, good manners and respect towards others without being submissive or bossy. These skills will stand her in good stead as she grows up and requirements from others increase manifold.
5. Let Your Daughter Make Her Own Decisions
When your daughter is old enough to know her likes and dislikes, give her the option of choosing what she wants to wear, eat or watch. You can tell her about your preferences and let her decide for herself. This is beneficial and needed for a better upbringing for a child.
Make it clear that you will be happy no matter what she chooses but also ensure that if something ever does not feel right to her, she can come talk to you and then choose something else. Let her know that you will support her no matter what she decides.
6. Be Honest To Your Daughter
Teasing, speaking ill of others or keeping secrets that your daughter can discover later are not healthy to any relationship. You should always keep her informed about the people she interacts with and avoid gossiping behind anyone’s back.
In order to be a good mother to your daughter you need to be honest about every little thing so that your daughter is never left in the dark about anything.
7. Act Less Like A Mom And More Like A Friend
You need to be your daughter’s best friend throughout her growing up years. She needs you to share her happiness, sadness, fears and everything in between. Let go of the mother role every once in a while, and enjoy being your daughter’s closest friend instead.
8. Spend Quality Time With Your Daughter To Maintain A Strong Bond
No matter how successful you are at work, don’t let it affect your bond with your daughter. A strong bond between a mother and daughter can last a lifetime.
If you have so much going on in your life, find time for her – even if it’s just a walk to the park or watching a movie together. Your daughter will only feel happy about seeing you happy.
9. Understand Your Daughter’s Privacy
The best way to stay connected with your daughter is to let her have her own space. Let her learn how to live independently and make decisions for herself.
She needs to have a life of her own without feeling too controlled by you. At the same time, learn to respect her privacy and remember that she is not a little girl anymore.
What NOT To Do When Trying To Be A Good Mother To Your Daughter
1. Don’t Focus Too Much On Your Daughter’s Looks
As a mother, you need to support your daughter in whatever she chooses to do. No matter how rebellious she gets, try not to become overly concerned with her choices of clothes and hairstyles. As a parent make sure that you focus on teaching her good values rather than giving her any unwanted opinions about the same .
2. Don’t Be Over-Protective
No child likes being overwhelmed by a mother’s attention. Let your daughter grow up and learn things for herself. Save your advice, opinions and help only when she asks. Learn to let go of control over her even if it seems nearly impossible to accomplish at times.
3. Don’t Compare Your Daughter With Anyone Else
Comparing your daughter with other girls might seem like an innocent thing to do, but it is highly unfair. Every child is unique in her own way, and there are no two children who are the same.
Therefore, comparing them will only end up making both of them feel miserable about themselves. Allow your daughter to discover herself without comparisons at every stage of her life.
4. Do Not Make Your Daughter Feel Guilty About Her Needs
There is a fine line between helping your daughter and making her feel bad about herself forever. If you force your opinions on her, she will most likely rebel against you in the long run.
Remember that your daughter needs to make decisions for herself and learn from every experience along the way. Avoid making her feel guilty about her choices or even trivial things like food etc. You should instead start empathizing with her more than anything else.
5. Don’t Expect Your Daughter To Take Your Side In Every Argument
You might want your daughter to be on your side against her father or any other family member. But forcing her to take sides in an argument will only push her away from you.
Rather try and understand that she is her own person with her own independent thoughts and feelings. She shouldn’t be forced into taking sides in an argument and she should rather learn how to make up with the other party in the end.
6. Don’t Expect Your Daughter To Share The Same Interests As You Do
Your daughter may not always like things that you do, and there’s nothing wrong in it either. You cannot expect your daughter to like everything that you like if she is a teenager or even a young adult.
Push your personal interests on her and she might easily become a rebel. So learn to respect her choices even if you don’t agree with them at times. She has to discover herself without being forced into things by you all the time.
7. Do Not Criticize Your Daughter In Public
You may have a different opinion about your daughter from what most people do, but it is never acceptable to criticize your child in public. Let her know that it’s perfectly alright for someone not to like everything about her and that there is nothing wrong with making mistakes as long as she learns from them later on.
8. Don’t Let Your Daughter Become A Victim Of Your Insecurities
One of the biggest reasons why many teens end up as rebellious as their teenage parents is insecurity. If your daughter sees that you are insecure, she will start thinking that it’s okay to be so too. On the contrary, if you don’t let her see your insecurities, she will start believing that it’s okay to be confident and independent.
9. Never Agree With Your Daughter’s Wrong Stances Only To Make Her Feel Good About You
She should always know that she can be right only when she has good reasons for her standpoints and opinions. She should also be allowed to make mistakes while learning from them later on, rather than feeling insecure about herself all the time.
10. Don’t Expect Your Daughter To Be Perfect
When we are young we tend to see our parents as somebody who know everything and can fix anything no matter what. This thinking needs to change gradually at every stage of life. Also, there might be times when your daughter makes poor decisions or does something wrong. But, do not put her down for that.
But you have to realize that she is still a growing teenager, who has a lot of growing up to do before she can take responsibility for her actions.
11. Do Not Force Your Beliefs On Your Daughter
Help your daughter discover herself through her own experiences, mistakes and opinions. Never expect her to take sides in an argument. Let go of the idea that she should act like you act or think like you think. Instead help her become a confident young woman who is secure about all the decisions she makes on her own.
12. Don’t Expect Your Daughter To Be Humble All The Time
You may want your daughter to be humble all the time and respect others even while being in a bad mood at times, but it’s not going to happen until she starts feeling good about herself within. This doesn’t mean that you should let her stomp over other people or make them feel inferior. You should rather teach her how to stay humble without hurting other people’s feelings.
These are some of the things that you need to keep in mind when you’re trying to be a good mother to your daughter. A loving and caring presence at home goes a long way towards making an impression, which she will carry with her all her life.
You can’t be a good mother overnight. It has to be an ongoing process till your daughter becomes an adult. Sometimes, you might slip-up in your behavior and say things that shouldn’t have been said or done. Don’t worry, that happens to all of us, just apologize for it and keep going.